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Upping the random thoughts

I found myself up far too early this Saturday morning. It’s been a long week, and I’d certainly had zero intention of being up “early” on this long weekend.

But sure enough, woke before 7am and wound up staying up. Decided to check out Netflix, which I’ve neglected for about a week, and opted to “start” watching the film Grownups from last year. Wound up going all the way through.

Next searched for stuff to add to the instant queue, and then something else to actually watch and decided I wasn’t in the mood for anything else at length. But there was “Up,” sitting in the front end of the instant queue where it’s been for months. And I haven’t seen any of the film since I went to see it in the theater a couple years back.

Surely, knowing what the beginning held and having been moved in the theater, I wouldn’t ‘fall for’ it again.

But I found myself amused at the beginning–the kids playing in the old house. Smiling at the wedding, wistful as they built a home, crushed at her news, wistful as they moved forward. Nodding in appreciation as “real life” again and again interrupted their plans, and honestly in tears as their lives reached a twilight.

And all through that…really no dialogue past their being kids.

It’s just all this fantastic, recognizeable imagery or symbolism or whatever. It’s stuff that while watching you can follow along and “get” what’s going on. You can fill in the missing dialogue in your own mind, with your own experiences and thoughts and hopes and dreams. You might find yourself projecting a bit, or identifying with stuff. Maybe not exactly–this is a fictional, animated production–but it has such a sense of authenticity about it.

I turned it off after the opener. Oh, I’ll go back and rewatch the whole thing, but as said above–not in the mood for anything at length at the moment.

And then I found that it’s really burrowed into my head, and stirred up my thinking.

Unfortunately, despite all that I read and write, I can’t really find words for it. There’s just this feeling, that I can’t quite describe. And sometimes I think the best expression of it is an analogy that few but comic readers can “get,” and it’s also summed up by the Kurt Busiek (Astro City) story “The Nearness of You.” I know that’s not my life, it’s a fictional story.

But sometimes, with all the what-ifs and if-onlys and all that, it’s easy to imagine all these alternate lives that “could have been” or “might have been,” and all that.

This is real life, though.

And I have no idea what’s coming.


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